I have the sex drive of a woman

I’ve seen a number of comments recently by some of my fellow sexually open bloggers/friends that (paraphrasing) “I may be a Woman but I have the sex drive of a Man”.

woman sex drive

I hate that saying.

To be completely fair, I have used it in my younger days, before I actually sat down and thought about the undertones. Before I began attempting to take critical looks at how sexuality, with an emphasis on female sexuality, is constructed by the world around us. Especially via the undertones of comments, expressions and the language we use.

A lot of things bother me now that didn’t before, but this one more than most because it is so often used by sexually liberated women as an expression of owning their sexual power. Which is awesome and I am obviously all about expressing ownership of your sexual power, but let’s do it in a way that doesn’t reinforce negative stereotypes about female sexuality.

By saying that having a strong sex drive, large sexual appetite, having multiple partners or being open about sex are manly attributes we’re just repeating the trope that women do not enjoy sex. We’re frigid. We use sex as a way to get what we want in relationships. You get my drift.

Obviously this isn’t true as myself and countless other women love sex, have fierce sex drives, multiple partners and are open about their sexuality. So can we have a new meme? How about “I’m a woman and I have the sex drive of a woman”. It works for me.

Leave a Reply